


Messages

by ketchupfromyoutube



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Daddy!Calum, F/M, daddy!5sos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-09
Updated: 2015-07-09
Packaged: 2018-04-08 10:56:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4302129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ketchupfromyoutube/pseuds/ketchupfromyoutube
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A lengthy daddy!Calum fic that chronicles your life from babies to hardships to a family you can call your own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Messages

“There’s daddy, see baby? Wave!” you whispered to your 3 month old daughter, adjusting the striped headband on her head of thick pitch black locks. 

“Jade, see? Over there!” you laughed, pointing toward your husband as he shook the man’s hand across the big lobby. Calum was wearing the forest green button up you bought him about three weeks before Jade was born. His hair was just as black as his little girl’s, and much messier. Even from here you could see the dark circles edged around his eyes. You were sure you couldn’t have looked better off.   
Jade swung her little head towards his direction with a little swirl of effort, lips pouting with either wonderment or utter confusion. Both made you melt. She looked just like him, the eyes getting you every time.   
When she saw her daddy, Jade squealed, the grin taking up her entire, chubby face. The tiny palms that gripped the plush giraffe clapped together jerkily, motor skills almost non-existent. You giggled while never taking your eyes off of her. “Yeah! Dada!” You encouraged, mouth open and making chirps to match hers.  
Calum’s head swung with just as much pure eager curiosity as Jade. He had a hope and excitement brimming those eyes at the sound of your baby’s voice. And the smile creased his cheeks deep, deeper than when he was just the nineteen year old you first met. Now twenty-six and your husband and the father of your child, with more stories to tell. 

“Baby girl!” Cal called straight away as his feet carried him across the room and over to his girls. Hurried and arms swung wide open. You watched his throat accommodate his breathy laughter as the smell of Jade’s skin travelled to your nose. Her knees dug into your side, the place you held her for nine months. Cal got to you quickly, hands stroking your hips and lips on your jaw.  
“Hey honey,” he cooed sweetly, the words skidding on the tiredness in his voice. Sleep hadn’t happened since Jade came to you two. It occurred more often in power naps while the other begged for energy over a bowl of half cooked oatmeal. Baby monitors lined the hallways and all of Calum’s shirts had hopeless stains. You knew because you lived in them now. Except for today, it being the comeback of your regular clothes from the closet. Which really just meant a graphic tee and pants with a zipper.  
“You sound exhausted, babe,” you said into the kiss, realizing the irony of your dazed criticism. If you weren’t busy breast feeding most of every single day, you might take up falling asleep while standing.   
“Well that’s because I am!” Calum sang cheerily, making a silly face at Jade and tickling her belly. “Hi sweet pea, daddy doesn’t remember what sleep felt like!” He continued with the carefree grin even as his shoulders slumped. You shook your head, all three laughing.  
“Oh god, we’re going insane…” you groaned around a chuckle, rubbing the pleas for rest from your eyelids. Adjusting Jade on your hip, you took a deep breath and reopened your eyes. Calum was watching you with a pensive expression. Well, all expressions nowadays got a bit clouded with the exhaustion, the latter wining out for notoriety every time. But because he was your husband and you knew him like your own heartbeat, you could see it. 

“Here, I can take her. Been having anxiety about being away all day.” Calum scooped her waist in his huge hands, lifting her up and onto his waist. 

“Cal…” you sighed, crossing your arms around your chest. No doubt it felt easier to stand without the constant wriggling of Jade, however odd at the same time. 

“I know, I just…it’s my first day away from baby girl…and that’s hard for me. Hate being away,” Cal muttered while his daughter thought it best to poke at his nose. “Hey precious, hiya…” he whispered gently, pecking her red cheek three times, making her gurgle happily. His thick brows furrowed and turned to you.

“She’s not responding to the cream the doctor gave us…still has this little rash.”

“Babies get acne, it’s perfectly okay babe.” You had to reassure Calum, already having told him the doctor never guaranteed anything. But as long as Jade was healthy and smiling, you didn’t worry.  
Calum was different, worrying about little things turning into big things, baby proofing before she could even sit up. If she had a loose string on her onesie, here came Calum speed walking to gently tear it off with his teeth. Scissors weren’t an option, not if baby girl was wearing it.   
You loved it, seeing your husband as a father. Learning every nuance and tendency he had as instinct. The natural born protector locking every door and checking every sound in the middle of the night. He made you safe, always.  
But he nodded at you now, taking your word for it. Jade twisted in his hold like the restless little ball she was, but Cal had her secure. It just made him giggle with her, his big and full to her gummy one. “There’s my girl, my other favorite girl,” he said as he eyed you through the thick fatigue. You couldn’t do anything but smile back at your husband, feeling the effort from him sink into you.  
Because both of you were so, so tired. Yet Calum always found ways to remind you of the obvious. He loved you, his family.  
“So what did Marty have to say?” You asked, nodding towards the man in a pair of black slacks and a band t-shirt. The assistant manager of the record label. Calum and the guys started it back on the first world tour and now they were signing bigger and bigger names. Getting busier…and busier.

“Oh, just telling me the details on possible tour dates we could list. The others are working out their schedules right now as well,” Calum sighed, throat sounding as sore as your feet felt. Jade kept nudging her chubby fingers at his collarbones, the sweetest look of concentration on her face.

 

“I’m sure Luke is never going to be able to tour, like…ever again. Rory just had a set of twins, Sara is barely walking.”

“Fuck, I know.” Calum only says that, laughing and shaking his head. You mirrored him but didn’t have to ask, you knew what he was thinking. They would find a way to get a small reunion tour started. Ash wasn’t married and Michael’s girlfriend wasn’t due for 7 months. Luke, on the other hand, had a rowdy two and a half year old daughter and twin baby boys.   
You all lived close, it was only natural that would happen. But with kids, things really didn’t come together smoothly anymore. Hell, breakfast was like climbing Mt. Everest half the week. 

“Mmm…ba!” Jade shouted straight into Calum’s ear, a proud smile on her lips making her look like you. Calum’s eyes squinted in the mild pain from how loud she was, but any other feeling was quickly replaced by joy in those eyes. He walked you both to the car, protected under his hold. Maybe tonight you two could finally get Jade to fall asleep in her crib, and not on your chest.  
Maybe.

_________________

Jade doesn’t go down easily, she never does. It’s 2:30 in the morning and you didn’t have your eyes shut for longer than a minute the whole day. Calum was stiff as a board next to you in the fluffy white comforter. His long body only dressed in his boxers, hair hopelessly messed up from his fingers constantly running through. He was frustrated, as were you. Jade’s painful sounding screams carried from her nursery all the way to your ears. You stared at the ceiling as if it were going to fall on you, or give you answers. It was way to late to try rationalizing what was going on in your head. All you knew was sleep might be the most beautiful and mysterious thing on this planet.   
“That’s it!” Calum groaned, sitting up all of a sudden, but there wasn’t enough energy in your body to be startled. You just bounced a bit off the mattress. 

“I’m gonna get her, she just won’t sleep in her crib!” Cal sounded close to tears, hands rubbing his face so hard you could picture red marks blossoming on the tan skin. 

“Fuck….fuck,” Calum whined, shoulder muscles rolling as he stretched. His legs moved as little as possible to carry him out and into the hallway. You stayed silent, fingers rubbing small circles across your tummy.

“Shh…shh…baby girl. Please, please be quiet…” You could hear your husband beg your daughter, voice so spent. “It’s okay baby…just go to sleep.”  
In a matter of ten or more pats of his bare feet against the wood floor, he is back. He was cradling Jade against his chest, hand soothing her tiny back. His eyes are closed and her mouth is chewing on his shoulder, getting him all wet. 

“She’s calmed down at least…” You whisper.

“Mmhm…” Cal mumbles, vocal chords like the undead.   
And then there’s the silence paired with the ruffle of the sheets, Calum getting back into bed. Jade’s gums against her father’s skin, the grabby hands on his chest and the flutter of her covered feet on his stomach. It was the only way she would sleep, on either one of you. Perhaps just needing the beat of your heart and the scent of your exhaustion, the most recognizable part of you now.

“Thanks, I love you.” The words are stuck in your mouth but make it into the air by sheer will of your lungs. You just needed sleep. Long…uninterrupted sleep.  
Calum doesn’t respond because he fell asleep the second his back hit the mattress, a place he used to make love to you. Where it was slow and passionate and easy. Now reduced to quickies in the shower or half awake grinding on the living room floor amongst baby books and spit up rags. 

Jade is asleep, your husband’s breathing lifting her higher and taking her down slow. You think it would be cute to match yours to it but before you know it, you’re out too.   
You woke up with Jade on your chest, and the sound of the radio filtering in from the kitchen. Calum’s spoon hitting the bowl and the crunching sound of cereal in his mouth. A small post it note in the dip of the bed that you called his side.

"Don’t thank me yet, she wanted to sleep on you next."

_________________

“Dada.” 

“Yes? Pretty girl?” Calum tilted his head at your 2 year old, sat on the floor next to her. He was lazily plucking at the strings of his bass, the summer afternoon breeze pushing the white curtains into the living room. 

“Straw…strawberry,” she settled on, waving her arms wildly to show him the block in her hand. Cal nodded encouragingly, as if the red square was in fact a strawberry and not, well…a block.

“Where did you learn that word, babe?” He asked, the soft notes of his instrument filling the room with low, calming tones. The ones he used to get Jade to fall asleep.

“Mama…” Jade told him, eyes as brown and curious as her daddy’s.  
You smiled down at the baby food you were spooning, standing in the kitchen. Felt Calum’s eyes on your back, up to the way your hair fell against your shoulder blades.

“Mama’s smart, huh bug?” Cal said, scooting closer to act like he was whispering into Jade’s ear, all while being loud enough so you could hear.  
“That’s one of the reasons I fell in love with mommy.”

Jade’s high pitched croon made you laugh, walking into the room. 

“Hey baby,” you blew a kiss his way before picking Jade up and setting her in the high chair. Immediately she started banging on the table, face scrunched up in a massive grin. 

“Wow, what a face! So beautiful, J,” you giggled. Just as you lifted the rubber spoon to her lips, you felt two large hands cup the roundest part of your hips. Felt his lips press warmly against your earlobe. 

“Hey mama,” Cal whispered, the smile dripping from his voice.  
Scoffing and rolling your eyes, you choose to ignore him. Jade has always been a good eater, taking the mushy apples with a smile and eyes roaming the house.   
Cal is nosing at your neck when his hands wrap all the way around your center, fingers folded above your belly button. “Heeeey.”   
He wants attention. Cuddles. Kisses. You know him inside and out. 

“Yes, my dear?” You teased, bending a bit to better feed the little one; Calum only curls around you instinctively. He lets a breath out his nose, causing the fine hairs around your temple to flail. 

“You’re pretty, and you smell good. And you are super good at feeding J.”

“Wow Cal, aren’t you full of compliments today.”

“Well, you’re my lil’ bean. Love you,” Calum mutters into your hair, kissing through to get to the softest skin of your scalp. His hips flush against yours, close as he can get. Your heart does that little flip, the one that happens whenever Calum made a fuss over you. When he’d make it clear just how much he wanted and needed you. 

That Saturday in summer was a good day. Jade met a dog at the park and Calum made you some green tea. Made you feel pretty and irreplaceable. It was a good day.  
_________________

“Listen, if I knew what the fuck that meant, maybe we wouldn’t be on the phone right now…having this conversation…right fucking now.”

The blue of the walls in your bedroom faded a bit. You shrugged at it. It only made sense that when the sun beat on something for so many days and nights, it would lose some of it’s life.   
It was kind of appealing, the palest of sapphires surrounding you at 6:00 pm. In nothing but the black lace tank top you bought on impulse at Target, little shorts to match. Hair pulled back tight and skin warm. Calum’s kisses burned the most perfect little impressions into you, like the post it notes that lined the halls. Jade’s messages to “Daddy and Mama.”

“She’s not ready to talk about it. No.”  
Calum paced the cream colored carpet with bare feet, the phone held tight in his white knuckles. Your hands were motionless, set between your thighs. Eyes lining up and down his arms, riddled with the indents and dusted rose puckers your mouth left. 

“Don’t you fucking dare. Don’t you say that, not to me.”  
And he looks back at you, quickly. You make eye contact and maybe you tried to smile, but you can’t find the feeling. Just wanted your husband.  
Calum mouths to you, the words “In a minute, baby”, his finger held up to show that just one more minute. Just one more and he’d be back to kiss you and feel you and touch all over you.  
To make it better. 

“Shit.” Cal whispers into his fist, eyes closed and finally standing still in the middle of the room. You notice his knuckles relax, perhaps defeated.   
“She’s going to be fine. She just needs time. It’s….it’s her mom, for fuck’s sake.”  
He turns his eyes on you and yes, of course you heard.   
“I’ve gotta go. Don’t call again, not for a long time.” And he hangs up on your uncle. Your uncle, who keeps calling, trying to rebuild a bridge he burned long before your mother died. Died last month.

“Hey, sweetheart.” Calum crawls across the bed to get to you on the edge, phone blank and on the love seat in the corner. Small bumps muffled through the walls tell you the Jade is content and playing in her room.

“Honey,” Calum tries when you don’t make a sound, chin tucked down to your chest. He’s right behind you, body radiating heat off and latching onto yours. 

“I love you so much, you know that…” You whisper, not shocked at the tears sticking to every syllable. You felt so heavy, weighed down by the hope you had in your head. Hopes to feel okay again, without mom.  
“I do know, of course I know that, lil’ bean. You’re my precious girl…” Calum said, scooping you up and settling back against the headboard with you safe in his lap. His palms graze the crimson hickeys laced on your hips and butt, petting you gently. You cry into his chest.

“I miss her, I really…I can’t…”

“I know baby…it’s not fair. Not fucking fair at all.”   
And the sniffling turns into sobbing, wrecked and inflating your entire body only to deflate with more haste. It felt empty and horrid and like your lungs were collapsing. Calum held you so close, arms at your curled up legs and your shaking back. Lips kissed your forehead, at your drenched cheekbones and the pulse at each wrist. Rocked back and forth like he did for Jade when nightmares would confuse make believe with reality.

“Kiss me.”

He does, lips plush and wet from your tears, now against yours. Tasted salty and chased the sour feeling away. He was here. Your love, your husband…was here. He always would be.   
And you cried, kissed him, and cried. Hungrily pushed his shoulders back into the wooden frame and licked into his mouth. 

“It’s going to be okay, my girl. My sweet girl…I’m so…so sorry…”  
You mewled into his lips, his intake of breath sucking all the gasps of anxiety and anticipation from your body and taking it on for you. You knew he would take it all from you and carry that weight. 

You needed him to.

Calum flipped you over, held up by his elbows and kissed down your neck and chest. Speaking his reassurances and promises into the skin he touched. “I am so in love…”

“Always need you…”

“Rest, baby girl. Please rest those eyes…”  
You closed your eyes, neck tipped back to give him more room. Each inch was pecked, sucked, each strand of hair tucked back into his hands. Calum kissed your body back to sleep, lips latched on your hips before making a map of your legs and toes. Your sobs wiped away and breathing calmed.   
The last thing you remember before stumbling into a dream was Cal’s wedding band pressing into the side of your waist, his body cuddled protectively around you. 

You woke up to a four year old Jade squished into Calum’s chest, each arm draped across both of you. A post it note stuck to your stomach. The writing is in her slanted crayon, but the spelling was with help from him.

"Daddy and I wanted to nap with you because we’re always here for you, Mama."

_________________

 

“Mama can’t hold you, babes. She’s got your younger brother in her tummy, and he’s grown a lot, he’s much bigger now!” Calum explained with wide eyes to Jade, now six. Her black hair was in a long, thick braid down her back, legs wrapped around Cal’s waist as he held her. He mixed the pancake batter with his free arm, more than strong enough to to both jobs. Breakfast and morning daycare.   
Jade pouted but nodded, leaning her cheek onto her father’s shoulder. One of her favorite places. “Okay…”

“That’s my girl,” Calum said, kissing her nose and making her giggle.

You watched Calum pour some blueberries into the bowl of batter, legs carefully carrying you down the stairs. Your belly was along 9 months; it was a miracle you were out of bed at this point. With a deep breath and each hand steady on your lower back, you smiled at your husband and daughter, who greeted you with surprised cheers.  
“Mama!” Jade squealed and kicked at Calum’s sides. He looked relieved for a moment, glad that her foot avoided his lower half. But his smile waned after setting Jade down to run at your legs, little arms hugging them tight. 

“Hey baby girl, good morning.” You ran your fingernails softly across her temples, squishing her cheeks. Just like Cal’s.

“You sure you’re good to be up?” Calum asked, kissing your jaw, one hand taking yours and another encompassing your tummy. One of the first things he did every morning. And of course, your baby boy was kicking.   
Always. Kicking.

“I just had to get some new scenery. Something other than the Ellen show from our bed. And…I heard you say pancakes.”   
Calum laughed, crinkles settling around his eyes. He bit his lip the way he did when you were eighteen and he was nineteen. When you were just babies. Now you had your own.

“Well, I can’t blame you baby, I do make the best blueberry pancakes this world has ever known,” he said, chin up. He helped you get into the cushioned breakfast bar stool, thumbs running over the belly once more before heading back to the food. Jade was sitting next to you, making a worn out sock monkey do back flips.   
And that Sunday morning in October was really peaceful. That night, when your water broke while you were setting My Little Pony to record for Jade, Calum rushed to get the overnight bag. Jade on his hip and you shoving your feet into your Ugg boots.   
October 9th, a bit chilly but crisp, was a beautiful morning. With a much longer and more difficult labor than Jade, your son came to your family. You were brushing his fine black locks back, his 7 lb. 3 ounce body cradled in the crook of your arms. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Jade scribbling on a bright yellow post it. You smiled from ear to ear and you and Calum shared a look when you read what she was jotting down.

"Good job Mama." 

_________________

 

“Shit. Fuck. Okay.” Calum’s voice was getting louder, your patience blowing out the windows you had thrust open in the afternoon. You needed to feel apart of the outside world, the one Calum was playing shows to.   
It was the smallest of shows, really. You should’ve understood. An overnight trip to L.A. that all the guys somehow found time for. But the thing was, Levi was six months old and still a handful. You were pretty exhausted all the time, between breast feeding and dealing with Jade’s outbursts at not being the only child anymore, and getting her to and from daycare. And you thought it best to pick some of the toys off the floor, especially after almost dying by the yellow claw of a Lego man. 

“It was…one night.” Calum said, hands gesturing stiffly around him, eyes set on you. You rolled your eyes, couldn’t help it. Patted Levi’s back softly, hoping that burping would help him finally fall asleep. You bounced on your heels to soothe him, not looking at your husband. Eyes hopping from place to place that wasn't him. 

“Seriously? You’re going to be pissed about this?”  
You spun then, unwashed hair hitting your cheek, eyes darker. 

“If you start yelling, and make him cry again…” You didn’t need to finish, shaking your head in a scowl. You felt so stuck, right in the middle of the living room, feet deep in wet concrete.   
Calum pushed his palms into his face, taking a deep breath, eyes closed. Chest rising and falling as calm as sand down an hourglass. Silent and inevitable. You watched him until you couldn’t be silent anymore.

“You didn’t ask me. You packed up and left without asking me.”

“You seemed fine with it!” Calum whisper shouted, arms thrust out, eyes wide.

“I smiled because you were so thrilled about it, what was I supposed to do? Be the bitch wife that tells you no?” You spat, padding quickly into Levi’s nursery and deliberately not looking in the mirror. In nothing but a pair of Calum’s boxers and his old soccer jersey, you were pretty sure you accidentally put on his deodorant as well. At least you wore some today, for fuck’s sake.   
“Maybe being honest? That’s always an option.” Calum followed you, of course. He braced his arms against the doorframe, leaning into the position a bit. Yeah, he might've hand the energy to hold himself up after a couple days away from the house.  
Once Levi was settled in, eyes closed, you turned to leave. Calum sighed, jaw clenched. But he let you through and under his arms, and followed you again, into the bedroom. He closed the door and you took a deep breath, back to him. The clothes in the laundry basket had been tangled for weeks. You felt your hands shaking with anger as you tried to fold. Something in this damn house had to be organized. Something had to work out, or you’d go crazy.

It’s silent for a few long moments, you tucking shirts into the drawers and sniffing. Calum walked towards you, arms hanging at his sides. 

“Babe.”

You shook out Jade’s favorite dress and felt as flimsy as the old tag at the collar. She lived in the thing, always getting it dirty, making you wash it again and again.

“Y/n.” Calum said again, voice louder.

“What?” You croaked, eyes and throat wet. You hated it.

“Talk to me.”  
You turned around then, dropping the dress shirt you so loved on Calum’s broad shoulders. The one he always wore on special nights. Like when he proposed, or when he told you he’d signed an album deal worth enough to take that trip to Italy. Or when he came home and found you leaping in front of the bathroom mirror, a positive pregnancy test in your hand. 

“And say what, Calum? That I’m fucking mad at you? I am.” You swallowed thickly, crossing and uncrossing your arms, caught between wanting to push him back and tug him into you. To have him wrap you up and squeeze the tension out of your body. You just wanted to feel small and taken care of. To be told you were doing something right.

“Okay, fine. I’m trying to figure out why.” He replied.

“Because I was here, running around with a screaming baby, a restless seven year old, trying to get food ready and I almost fucking died on a set of Legos-”  
Calum blinked, stepping closer and taking your hands. You shook them off, wiping your face dry with trembling fingers. You didn’t know why you were being so dramatic. Hormones. Exhaustion. In need of a shower. All of the above.  
“Stop pushing me away! Fuck,” Calum shoved his hands into his hair, messing it up further since the red eye flight he took to get home and be with his family. “How can I help if you shut down and blame it all on me?”

“Blaming? Whose blaming? I’m just telling you how this weekend went down. It sucked. And if stating the facts is blaming to you, fine.”  
You were furious now, pacing the room and throwing your hands into whatever looked like it needed organizing. It kept you busy, or looking busy. Either one was fine. It didn’t matter.  
“Please, baby. You’re overreacting and I’m not really in the fucking mood. I took a red eye to get to you and I was thinking of you the whole trip-”

“A red eye? I was up all night trying to get your son to stop crying. Because if he wouldn’t stop, Jade couldn’t sleep and here I was…” Your voice broke but you kept going. 

“In bed, Levi on my chest like Jade liked it when she was that small and…and she was on your side. Just saying over and over, ‘I want daddy’…I didn’t sleep. I wanted you too. I…wanted you.” You were crying now, no use in trying to put it off any longer. Felt it take over your entire body, back shaking and hands covering the overflow of tears that caught your top lip. Your ears throbbed and your chest took a beating from your frantic heart. Exhausted. And in need of your husband. Your stupid, silly, strong, level headed husband.  
“Honey…honey I’m so sorry, baby come here.” Calum swept you into his arms, lifting you slightly so your feet stood on his with ease. His long, protective arms were so warm and wrapped around you entirely, just how you wished.   
“I’m so sorry. I’ve got you my lil’ bean…I’ve got you.”  
You gasped out a laugh at the nickname, it bringing you so much relief and joy. You would always be his little bean. Since lacing your fingers with his after a show years ago and still today, tip toes on his feet and lips at his collarbone. He kissed your head and spoke into your hair, hands rubbing soothing circles all along your back. Fitting a bit more of who you were back into your body.   
“Yeah, that’s right,” He chuckled.

“Always my lil’ bean.”

_________________

Calum’s tongue poked out to catch the little dot of toothpaste edging away from the corner of his plump lips. The plaid pajama bottoms hung so low on his insanely long and lean torso. His stomach looked so fucking nice, in the soft glow of the bathroom lights. Hair thick and begging to be ruined by your eager fingers. You bit your lip hard, just picturing how he’d look above you, shoulders strong and back muscles rolling beneath your palms. Sweat lining his forehead and neck, littered with bite marks. Slick with your saliva.

“Hey beautiful,” you whispered, leaning against the doorframe, hands tucked obediently behind your back. Calum almost dropped the toothbrush into the sink, jaw gone slack at the sight of you. You stood there in a new set, all white straps criss crossing your stomach and lace barely holding your breasts in. The panties with a small crystal heart and ribbon on each hip.   
The collar around your neck had a small tag, delicate stones spelling out “Baby Doll.”

“Oh, h-hi. Hey.” Calum’s elbow gave out, arm quivering and reaching out for the counter. He knocked over the lotion by the vanity, barely catching it in time before it slid across the tile. You giggled, stepping closer and pulling him back by the strings of his pj’s.   
“Shit.” Calum gulped, hands a little shaky at his sides. It had been a while, and tonight, you wanted it rough, and hard. 

“Baby, I estimate about an hour and a half.” You told him, swiveling on your heel to stand before him, the bed behind your calves. Calum towered over you, chest already heaving with excitement. You smiled, full of adoration for him, your man. Tucking some fly away baby hairs at his temple, you tugged him down so you could whisper in his ear.

“Fuck me baby, please fuck me hard.”

And he didn’t waste any second of the hour and a half he had to fuck his wife. Both kids in their rooms and sound asleep across the second story. He had you up and wrapped around his torso in no time, falling back onto the bed and kissing your lips with fevered hunger. A daze in his bones with one intention. 

“Fuck, I thought it was the premier of Ellen’s new talk show tonight,” he moaned into your neck, latching on to suck and bite at the tender spot he knew so well. 

“I’m recording it.” You threw your head back in ecstasy, ankles crossed at his butt, yanking him in closer. You both gasped as his hard on pressed into your lace covered heat. “Hey there big boy,” you giggled, lips glistening from his wet and enthusiastic kisses. He laughed, blushing from his cheeks to his neck.   
And you could still make each other blush.

Calum wasn’t gentle with the straps and delicate lace of your lingerie, ripping the center and promising to treat you to hundreds more as you kicked his pajamas off his toned and fit legs. They got smushed somewhere at the foot of the bed, both of you throwing the comforter over your naked bodies. His arms folded and held him up on either side of your head, eye to eye, chest to chest. Your nipples were red and pebbled from his suckling and tongue flicking across each one lovingly. Greedily. Breasts now drenched and heaving against his bare and vibrating chest. Each moan wracking your body as if it was your own.   
He did belong to you, and you to him. 

His cock felt so full and thick inside of you, condom slick. His thrusts were deep and so intimate. You couldn’t tell which heartbeat was your own, not wanting it any other way. His arms scooped you up as they slid beneath you, after lifting your legs to rest on his shoulders. As deep and as close as he could go, Calum went. He’d take his time to stop to savor how it felt to be this hot and surrounded by your body’s own will.  
“I love you. I love you more than anything baby. My fucking girl.” He growled, teeth clenched and nipping at your jawline as he pounded into you. Fucking you just as hard and rough as you pleaded. You knew your husband would never disappoint you. Never could.   
It turned out you had an hour and forty-five minutes. Calum kissing you lazily, your head resting on his chest after a handful of intense orgasms. Levi’s wailing started at that time, the glowing blue of the digital clock reading 12:00 am. Calum pecked your nose and tucked the sheets down. 

“I’ve got it.” He whispered, much to your delight. 

“Thanks sweetheart.” You sunk into the bed, stretching your slightly sore legs.

“Besides, you probably need all the rest you can get after I rocked your whole world like that,” Calum said with a smirk, strutting out of the room. You tossed a box of tissues at him, laughing hard at the affronted glare he shot back at you. 

“Shut up, you’re such a moron,” you groaned with the biggest, most relaxed smile you had all week.

_________________

“Mama?”   
Jade was glueing a yellow sun to a blue sheet of construction paper, Levi sitting in his high chair and staring at her with his big green eyes. You stopped giggling over something Calum was whispering in your ear and looked over at her. “Yeah baby?”

“I need some help with my…family…thing.” She muttered, two front teeth lost and making her lisp. You smiled at Cal, flicking his chest and getting off his lap to walk to Jade. 

“Well, what kind of family thing is this, exactly?” 

“For my class,” the lisp was so strong, you had to stifle a laugh. It was just too cute, but Jade didn’t like it. 

“Oh okay.” You leaned over and stole a cheerio from Levi’s little table, making him look at you with wide eyes. He was always amazed by whatever he saw; you loved it. You waved to him as she explained.

“We have to write about what our family is…is like.”

“Well, just say your dad is handsome, strong, kind of like a superhero…”

“Daaaddy!” Jade absolutely lost it, giggling over her markers and kicking her feet back and forth. You scrunched your nose at him and joined in on her groans. “I know, daddy’s so silly huh Jade?” 

“Yeah!”  
Levi squealed at the noise and pointed his chubby hand out at nothing in particular. Calum cheered as he jogged over to his son, plucking him from his chair and lifting him into the air. Utter joy took up your baby’s face, more glad than anyone’s ever been to be in his father’s safe and capable arms.   
“What do you think our family is like, baby girl?” You asked Jade, sitting down and helping her draw a flower by the side of a green house. 

“Happy. Loud, tall…” 

“Tall?” Calum questioned, brows knit. 

“Daddy, you’re really tall!” Both of you chuckled, but you had to agree. 

Jade went back to her drawing, face down and lips pursed.  
You watched Calum sing softly in Levi’s ear, a melody you knew for a long time. 

“We’re happy,” Jade repeated.  
You looked at her, the thick black locks she and her brother got from daddy. You watched daddy with your son, his nose just like yours. His giggle unique and breathy. Jade loving to create new messages along the halls for mommy and daddy and baby brother. Post its always on the grocery list and taped to the walls.

That night in May is a gorgeous one. The maple trees in the backyard fragrant and rustling in the soft evening air. Levi falls asleep on Calum’s chest just like Jade always did. She’s sat on the living room rug, her favorite penguin movie just ending.   
You watch them all, and that little empty space you used to get lost in doesn’t feel so big. You know the sound and sensation and the names and the faces that will call you right back where you belong. 

Calum wakes up the next morning to the smell of french toast wafting through the hall, and a post it note right on his forehead. 

"Our superhero."


End file.
